Happy To Want Less

Once upon a time, a coach I was working with told me I could be another Tony Robbins. 

I said, no. I had no desire to be the person who I would have to become to do that. 

He didn’t understand, and not long after that told me he couldn’t work with me anymore. Well, his actual words were he couldn’t help me anymore.

I suppose, in his mind, I was beyond help. 

But it wasn’t that. What he wanted for me, I didn’t want for myself. And not for one second, have I ever regretted that decision. But what did I want?

Less. And more.

Less need. More grace. 

Having worked in the financial industry for years, I knew that all the money in the world, the biggest house, the biggest company, couldn’t buy grace. Didn’t bring happiness. 

We find grace and happiness elsewhere. And once found, wealth doesn’t rob us of them; it serves them.  

As the world is in reset mode, and people decide whether kindness is more important than the right to do whatever they want to do, most of us are also resetting our wants, needs, and priorities. 

But, when it is all over, what will we go back to? Do we have to choose overwhelm? 

For me, in that moment when I said no, I decided to want less, and be more happy. But I still constantly re-examine exactly what that means for me.

It doesn’t mean I don’t plan on doing more. Happiness and expansion are not exclusive. It’s how it’s done.

Expansion and sharing is the essence of life. From the expansion of the universe, to the continual growth of a forest, we understand that to be true. All life expands. But nothing in nature does it by itself. Each element intertwines within the whole.

All our lives are also intertwined. My need can not override yours. My expansion can not destroy yours. And the way we each expand is personal and uniquely individual.

I expand and share as a turtle, and I am happy to be one.

Every day I write a little of the next book. Edit the one I just finished. Record the audio of the book before that. Edit that recording. Learn something new. Spend time on ads and marketing. Coach. Teach classes. Work on websites and merchandise. 

And I also work in the garden, walk, do yoga and pilates, make a meal or two, read, watch TV, talk to Del, check in with family.
 Step by step, plodding along. Wanting less, being more happy. But still with big dreams about what I want to do in life.

Nelson Mandela said, “It always seems impossible until it’s done.” 

It’s all about intent. The goal and the to-do list follow. They don’t drive the action; they are the action.

Did I want to be the next Tony Robbins? No. 

But I did, and do, want to shift people’s ideas and lives towards the infinite. That’s my intent. That’s my mission. That’s the dream I follow. How big or small that becomes, is not what is essential. 

Doing it well is.

We don’t have to choose overwhelm. We can walk away from it. We can want less. And still do more—in our own way. 

Be the next Tony Robbins, or Oprah, or Steve Jobs if that is your calling. I’ll be rooting for you. But do it your way and don’t give up the essence of your life to do it.  It won’t be worth the price.

And every day, each of us has to ask ourselves the same question. “What is more important in this moment, and will it be kind and helpful for others?” 

If we do that, we may find ourselves in that state of mind called heaven on earth. And really, what could be more important than that? 

Do you like the idea of Grace? Check out this book.